My Fear- What Am I Afraid Of?
Aloha my friends! This Hawaiian greeting is appropo as it conveys affection, peace, compassion, mercy, and hospitality- my wishes for you today! As for me….
THIS MORNING WAS VERY TELLING AND QUITE EYE OPENING
But first, back in 2006 I was about 35 pounds heavier and really unhappy/uncomfortable about the way I felt and the way I looked. The number my body was holding onto did not feel like “me.” I was physically hanging out in a soft and squishy place, but my ethos was nestled in a different spot, somewhere stronger, healthier, happier, smarter and more energized. The outer Kiki did not match the inner Kiki, this was a real problem for me. So that year, oh my goodness it has been ten years- a decade ago that I decided to switch from soft and squishy to my “Kefi”ethos. In August that year, upon arriving home from Greece, my personal sound mind/healthy body personal journey began, when for the first time ever, I hired a personal trainer to teach me how to get healthy and stay healthy. I thought I would hit the bulls eye by the end of that year.
YOU CANNOT QUIT THE PROCESS
The first person I worked with got me close to my goal, but then a change occurred and I had to start over with someone new. The end of the year became the beginning of next year, and then every two years I would work with a different trainer due to life circumstances. Was it circumstances, information, my desire or fate that would keep me from reaching my simple goal and pairing me with a new person each time? I sincerely believe what Lisa, my sensei, told me, “Things work out when YOU are ready for them, and the people to help you get those things will come into your life at that point and time.” This analogy inadvertently set the course of my journey and with the people helping me achieve my goal. Since that time, and to this day, I have worked with and learned from 7 educated and fitness/nutrition trained professionals. Each person worked with me and trained me to the best of their ability. You may ask yourself, why has it taken Kiki so long and why is she still working with all these people? The answer is twofold: one is because while I have made significant emotional/physical strides, I simply did not reach the finish line of my original goal. The past decade taught me a ton, and I am definitely in a better/stronger place, with numerous minor fluctuations, but still in all I have not exactly achieved my personal goal that was set in 2006, hence the continuation of this chapter, which will not be concluded until the number is reached. PERIOD. The second thought about this ridiculous amount of time to reach my goal is that learning and living a lifestyle is similar to the 10,000 rule, which is to work at something that many times before you master it.
Fast forward to today, this day, when I was doing my NASM workout with Jill, number 7 in the litany of trainers/nutritionists. Before the workout started, she put me to the mental test. After fifteen months of working together she said, “What is it going to take to get you to the next level, a level that takes you to the finish line?” This question scared me because I’ve been so close for so long and I keep dropping the ball when I’m about 50 meters from finish. I got to thinking….
MY FEAR- I REALIZED THIS MORNING IS – ME
Attaining my physical goal, which I set in 2006, is in direct correlation to my professional purpose. All these years I have been driving and working for something that I was not prepared to entirely embrace and so I kept myself a little soft. Sounds crazy doesn’t it, but too close, too many times has its reasons. Mind you my pilot light has been lit this entire time, just shining a little dimmer than it should be. Living and doing the process all these years has brought me to this day- the day that I must kick it up a notch. I am ready to act differently, and I fully understand and embrace the notion that achieving the lean, strong and healthy body I deserve will accelerate my ability to maintain the necessary discipline to write the last chapter of this book and move forward into the next exciting novel of my life.
GET ON WITH YOUR PURPOSE
It’s time to stare fear in the face and say….I’m really ready for this! I can do this. I have amassed the experience for phase Kefi! I’m tightening my belt, changing the dance moves and taking the lead. Perfection is not my target, however focus, discipline, preparedness, continued learning, and time management are my allies. My lean, strong and healthy body is not a distant dream, but it is within arm’s reach and in direct correlation to the demands/discipline of my production company. Each require dedication, perseverance, mental toughness and commitment! OK- bring it on Kiki Vale.
Regarding my weight, only nine pounds to go, and those suckers have been looming on my frame for seven months – but I’ll dump them taking it 21 days at a time.
HERE’S MY 21 DAY PLAN:
Meal plan every night for the next day
Each meal includes : a protein, a carb and a healthy fat
When dining out make and eat the cleanest of choices
Eat the proper amount of food and the right combo of food
Drink 8- 10 glasses of water each day
Log every morsel of food into My Fitness Pal- the tracking method I use
Do every workout assigned
Avoid the white devil- SUGAR
Get a little uncomfortable and enjoy it
Stay on track
Remind myself that I have the nutritional tools and confidence to complete my mission
What I lose is what I gain!
Whatever your journey is today, if it matters, if it is important and if you must take it, by all means….
DON’T MAKE YOUR FEAR MORE POWERFUL THAN YOU ARE!
Your’s in Kefi,